18 April 2010

(Brief Notes On Discipline)

Filed under: Fiction, Reflections — ktismatics @ 9:24 am

The supporting structures have cracked and splintered, the skin is shredded and torn, leaving only the ruins of an extinct medieval animal. Its call, long unheard in the world, echoes in forgetfulness. There remained in this silent world a great and pernicious formula, dangerous, forlorn.

The streets of the city teemed with police looking for crime. To keep the formula from repeating itself, two of the urban policemen bent and snatched it from the bush on which it had been growing, poised on the verge of differentiation, its unknowns about to take on values of grotesque proportion. As the few open spaces remaining in the city began closing in on themselves, the policemen released their grip. The formula, exhausted, fell to the sky, where it exploded into a million points and vectors of unspeakable abstraction.

To this day the celebration continues in minute and meaningless rites unnoticed but by those assigned to perform them.



  1. “You called my use of initials egregious so I said that I couldn’t think of anything more egregious than your name – because of the way you bully people.
    I’m very glad you don’t know my name. John does. Notice the difference?”

    Okay, more games. kvond was totally right. Congratulations, ‘NB’, you outed John on his own blog, he must love you for that. You might as well close down all comments, no need to block me, of course NB was several other names. Anyway, you lied like hell about this, and in emails too, so it’s over. You can delete this, but you’ll have to read it here, as I have no intention of writing you any more personal correspondence. What I said about ‘bad faith’ was true.

    “And if you recognise my anger as peculiar to me – I certainly recognise yours – then why bother with all the NL rubbish? I don’t care about NL and actually know very little about him.”

    As he’d say himself. ‘he probably doesn’t give a flying fuck what you care about’, as he’s doing just fine, you know. I do find it interesting you brought up the ‘NL rubbish’. Obviously, you brought it up yourself. You have bullied people with your smug attitude, your cheap psychiatric posturing, and your ‘scientific superiority’–which is not the case. So, I suppose you’ll be able to go unpseudonymous by 2011? Good. Crucifixion? Good. Fuck you both.


    Comment by anonymous — 19 April 2010 @ 8:44 am

  2. Of course, I know that you were manipulating behind the scenes, including with people I can’t mention, John. That’s your Christianity, I suppose. And cod knows we all want to help CR. It’s easy enough to see why I wouldn’t seem sympathetic, compared to some schmoe who parades around smugly without much talent, which is what you’ve got now with your pet, NB.

    I suppose you lost interest in keeping me as a conversationalist after you realized I didn’t trust you anymore, and was taking care of important matters elsewhere (it’s vaguely possible you could find out where one of those is, impossible that you could find out the other.) Actually, I don’t blame you for anything, but in not erasing what NB said, and closing the thread, you made your choice. That’s the same kind of ‘Christianity’ that made you get freaky over little parodies Dejan did about KDD, which amounted to very little. But, as I said yesterday, we all pay for whatever privileges we get, and it’s not really offensive that you’ve chosen a kind of caricature of ‘brotherly love’; you wouldn’t have realized that that has its own hidden cruelties in it, so you opt for the ‘M’s’, like the good Naderite you are.


    Comment by anonymous — 19 April 2010 @ 8:49 am

  3. And fuck your ‘peace of mind’, you let ‘NB’ have his say and closed the thread so I couldn’t have a say. Of course, you knew I could write on another thread if I realized there was nothing to value here for me anymore. And, of course, there isn’t. I told you I was beginning to lose respect for you yesterday, I wouldn’t say I fully have lost that, as you do try, given your surrender to the Cross, and so it was worth it to realize that Jesus realize does mean absolutely nothing to me, and to pronounce in front of a couple of closet wannabe-lapsed Christians.

    Of course, in your choice, I suspect you knew you’d run me off, or didn’t you? Did you really not think I’d think this was different? Of course it is. You’ve been lying all the way down the line for NB, and he’s probably the one that made the shit up about Robin and Damian. You really played that one to the hilt, I’ll credit you there.

    I would imagine you worked with Dejan on a lot of the business over there, although you said you didn’t. Why would I believe you about anything though? You’ve had your fun playing with me like most of the others, maybe you can say you planned it to be concluded like this, but I doubt it. Dejan would say the same thing, but that’s false too. What was true was that you did want me to have suffered permanent damage from the affairs that went on (and may still be, so why don’t you get on the emails with your spies, believe me, they’re not all listening.)

    As for some of the text in the Nick business, I wouldn’t believe a thing you said about whether you’d written some of it or not any more. One thing is certain, you’ve outed yourself as a liar. I didn’t know that it ran so deep.

    You couldn’t possibly really like someone like me, you might admire certain things, but your background makes you stick to certain dogmas. I guess that’s enough.


    Comment by anonymous — 19 April 2010 @ 9:02 am

  4. Interesting that the ‘saintly Christian’ type ‘wants to have his cake and eat it too’, just like everybody else. That explains your little ‘fairness routine’ about how you ‘like me and NB’. You don’t. You like him, but other people do like me. Anyway, thanks for the attention you gave my book. We got the final schedule for the large book yesterday, but you won’t have to read that one. You see, I KNOW you’re trying to be nice, but you’ve got a serious mean streak, so don’t pretend you don’t. You probably even do know it, and kvond did a good job of pointing out what it was; I just didn’t realize it at the time, and thought he was wrong.


    Comment by anonymous — 19 April 2010 @ 9:07 am

  5. Fine, you’ve had your say; move on if you like. I don’t reveal what others tell me in private correspondence, but if NB wants to let you know that he’s told me his real name then that’s fine with me.


    Comment by john doyle — 19 April 2010 @ 9:31 am

  6. “I do find it interesting you brought up the ‘NL rubbish’. Obviously, you brought it up yourself.”

    No, I didn’t – get over your bad faith and look at your “bad faith” comment on the previous post, which was a response to John’s question about your ideas about my identity. And look this on your first comment here:

    “You might as well close down all comments, no need to block me, of course NB was several other names.”

    Get over it. I’m just someone – one person – you feel “bullied” by because I run rings around you.

    John, apologies if I’ve dropped you in some kind of shit.


    Comment by NB — 19 April 2010 @ 10:10 am

    • Get over it. I’m just someone – one person – you feel “bullied” by because I run rings around you.

      Sorry, you just wish you did, and never did.

      No, I didn’

      Yes, you did. You said at Dejan’s that ‘there is no love like your love for Land’s’, which was the only decent mistake you ever made.

      Usually, in your fake superiority, you just say ‘My commiserations, John’. But your having captured John doesn’t prove much, because you still don’t have any identity. Eat shit and die.


      Comment by anonymous — 19 April 2010 @ 1:18 pm

      • If you’re one person, it doesn’t matter, because you don’t tell me who it is, so you’re a non-entity, as well as some of the others, but it’s too boring, and you’re SO fucking provincial. We just had DRAGON FRUIT, you shithead, as well as many more things, but I withhold them from HTML. Okay, write what you want, you have your thrilling success in wherever, but who cares? I don’t give a fuck about you or John, so I write anything. You’re both liars.


        Comment by anonymous — 19 April 2010 @ 1:24 pm

    • “{Get over it. I’m just someone – one person – you feel “bullied” by because I run rings around you.”

      Everybody is ‘one person’. I can’t think of anybody but Nick who would write the above, though, so I’ll just assume you are ‘NL’, and NB probably just stands for Nick Bataille, as I well remember your remarks when John reviewed ‘his’ book. OR, you could just be John himself, he’d do that, I suppose. but that’s not the style. I imagine only Nick would write ‘I run rings around you’, although he knows that’s not so by now, and you probably just want me to specify that here. I’m not going to, but I’m sure he’s aware of all of this, and he knows that I still have a lot of cards to play. You might have just read some of his things at CPC and you may have written those yourself, since you think you can convince me you have an identity while not having one. I did remember once Nick writing at CPC that ‘CR ran rings around me’, which was when I lost respect for him: His meanness and self-serving nature hadn’t bothered me nearly as much as realizing he couldn’t even recognize total mediocrity. But he probably realized I was figuring out his game. Not that I knew John was involved, he always claimed not to be. But he always read the stuff, and one time Nick wrote that ‘Doyle is probably the only one to have the balls to understand this thing’, so I might as well just assume that you are Nick and that you contacted him at some point after I emailed you/him the discussions of my book on here. It was you who said that Nick’s stuff was ‘all crap’, which was the kind of thing Nick would do about himself, in order to then resurrect it on the same thread, praising it. That could be when the two of you began your obvious conspiracy, although I agree you don’t sound like Nick that much.


      Comment by anonymous — 19 April 2010 @ 7:11 pm

  7. No worries. Play it out if you like: we’re all big boys.

    For anyone following along at home, this conversation carries over from the prior post and has a long history behind it. This post? I was just messing around while listening to King Crimson’s Discipline album, found that I’d been doing my jottings in the blog framework, and decided on a whim to put it up as a post.


    Comment by john doyle — 19 April 2010 @ 10:21 am

  8. NB, if you’re not Nick Land or traxus, you don’t interest me. Got it? They’re the only ones I ever found sexy. Now if you’re either one of them, then you may say so. As for ‘your running rings around me’, then keep it up, you’re just an online entity. I’m not going to re-read or read anything you said, you’re just an online entity who apes Nick Land sometimes. John approves of you and not of me, that’s the only revelation. But so what? I slready said yesterday if you really wanted to ‘run rings around me’, you’d have had to get to the real powers. You didn’t, though. Now, I doubt that one blogger has betrayed me even so, but if she has, I’ll find out soon enough, and it won’t matter very much. If you’re just ‘cr’, or the equivalent, it would come as no surprise that John would protect you, as he does do that sort of thing. If you think his preference for you over me is so blue ribbon, then that’s okay, you can have him. I didn’t know that to be christlike, you had to use ‘personal correspondence’ only to manipulate, which is what John does. He thinks ‘not leaking personal correspondence’ is some kind of major virtue, even though he really just must not have anything better to do than manipulate with it. Big surprise somebody would use it as evidence, innit, as you brit or fake-brit would say. If you’re so hot, get da big man (or the internet freak who thinks he does) to delete my posts. He might. I wouldn’t care, that would tell me everything, except that I already knew it anyway. Closet queens doing the lower-middle-class socialist route will do anything. You’ll never get past your HTML addiction, I imagine. But it’s fun beating your ass, and I’m sure your asshole has many rings. John can edit this for his christian, of course, I don’t give a fuckin’ shit.


    Comment by anonymous — 19 April 2010 @ 2:44 pm

  9. Very clear that both of you did a lot of the writing in the Nick affair at CPC, and that Dejan knew all about it. john said this was not so, but if you’re doing it, it’s obvious you wouldn’t give that away. Why he told me Robin and Damian were Joxter and Martin I have no idea. You obviously ARE the one who wrote him that, or you wouldn’t have then written that John knows your real name. Of course, it’s not at all obvious that he even does. That’s just the latest manoeuvre in this thing. John probably does NOT know what your real name is. Nick Land would ever tell anybody he was writing this stuff on John’s and Dejan’s blogs, although he definitely was, and has said so to me many times. Or rather, not John’s, but Dejan’s.

    Just to say that you could tell John a fake name and say ‘that’s my real name’. So that, when there’s lying, which you both have felt the safety in, there’s always something left untended and unproven. That’s what’s interesting about the claims you make: They don’t mean anything if you just say them–it’s hard for me to believe you really think I would be intimidated by somebody who completely withholds identity. I didn’t answer John’s queries about ‘your identity’, obviously, because he knows the other monikers you use here, since you are involved with each other in doing this strategy. He knows which ones I meant just as you know which ones I meant. What you expect me to do, just as Dejan did, is to respect these fake identities, and respond to them as if they were new and different each time, and you just return to your ‘one person’ thing at convenience. That’s the whole game that was played at CPC, and it’s true I didn’t expect John to be that sewerlike himself, but he’s got his problems too.

    Of ocurse, you know all this, but just thought you could bend me to your will, by claiming your superiority again. But you don’t have it now, nor did you have it before. You claim it, thinking that i still think of you (or your impersonation of Nick) as some kind of ‘hero’, but more ‘heroin’ as in the drug sometimes, yes, you’re just sort of visceral sensation, and the game here was run exactly as at Dejan, who was forgiven since he agreed to be the ‘mascot’ or ‘total toilet bottom’ of the blogosphere. I wouldn’t do that, which is the only offense I’ve made to toilet bottoms like you are, in fact. Not ‘heroine’, no, I don’t see you as a woman, even it was you who said something like ‘Making love used to mean whispering sweet nothings…now it means getting fucked’. Of course, that is what you like to have done to you, to get fucked in the ass, and that is why you are in deep therapy. Your impotence is your constant advertisement of the distorted personality that has been produced by your sessions. You are the same ghoul as Nick Land even if you’re not married to the same woman. I would simply have to really ‘get it’ what the ‘rings’ were, and I couldn’t have any idea what the ‘drug rings’ are except the ones that I like, and why would you give me those? To then take them away? But you can’t. You should simply not have given them to begin with. As for John, he knows what he’s in for no matter what he does on this blog. It’s possible you think that in presenting yourself as a submissive male, you can still have the Top Job, but it just doesn’t work that way. You needed to get me to worship you cock, and that is not something you ever succeeded in doing.

    I DO, however, see that you find these virtual ‘rings’ to be a sign of some sort of victory, you claim it as often as Susan Boyle breaks the line of ‘I Dreamed a Dream’. Even if you were not Nick Land, your imitatiion of him means that you just stole his tricks and tried to use them. That’s possible. But he never managed to get them to work any more than you and John have in your obvious conspiracy.

    It’s no coincidence that Dejan has entered with the advent of this thread, because he has been apprised by both of you on this the entire time. He has only to point out that I’m ‘paranoid’, otoh I know it’s not an across-the-board conspiracy. I assume it just involves Dejan, John, Nick, Robin, Damian, a few others. The purpose being to turn me into what you have already accepted is the normal ‘person’. But you don’t have any ‘person’ left. What you think of me doesn’t matter even to you, the game is to make me believe that what you SAY about me is what I will believe about myself. But that’s long gone. I tested all of them out carefully, and they were all lacking. Why would this one be any different? You’re frustrated in your lives and want to have some pleasure in them, and socialists never think that snobbism is a ‘minor vice’, I’ve noticed that. It is the cardinal sin. And coreless people are attracted to each other. I didn’t care if Nick was coreless, since he always ends up giving me the ‘drugs’ anyway, but I was somewhat surprised John was coreless. Dejan, of course, and long has been.

    Okay, if it’s just hatred, don’t expect it to not be returned in full. And I’ve got lots more outlets, all legal.


    Comment by anonymous — 19 April 2010 @ 7:35 pm

  10. What have you learned from this discussion, anonymous? That you and NB don’t like each other, which was known already. That NB has told me his name, but he hasn’t told it to you. I knew that, NB knew that, you didn’t — now you do. I said that I don’t divulge what people tell me in emails, and you knew that before too. That’s all. As I’ve assured you before, I had nothing to do with NL or whoever it was who corresponded with you all that time on the CPC, and whom you say also stalked you in the real world. I don’t know who did. I have no reason to suspect that NB had anything to do with it. Now you can harbor all manner of suspicions about it, hate whomever you like, but that’s all there is to be known from me. What now? You’ve had your say. Maybe NB and Dejan will reply and keep the discussion going. If so I won’t cut it off, at least not yet. If you have any more questions for me I’ll do my best to answer you. But this heaping of accusations is pointless and misguided.


    Comment by john doyle — 19 April 2010 @ 8:40 pm

    • That NB has told me his name, but he hasn’t told it to you. I knew that, NB knew that, you didn’t — now you do.

      But you told me you didn’t. Anyway, of course you prefer Dejan and NB, you just proved it again, you closed the other thread on me, but this one you’re leaving open for them. I knew this was your basic sentiment most likely, but I wasn’t sure of it till now. I DON’T know that NB has told you his real name, that’s what’s changed since this afternoon. He could swear that he has, and you can swear that he has, but you don’t know what I’ve been up to, and if he does know, he’s not going to say. He was hoping that I would say that here, but I’m no fool.

      No, I’m sure he told you some name, but that it wasn’t his real name. Why do you think I’d believe that one ace in the hole that you WOULD have were it true. Because neither of you can prove that you do know NB’s name without full disclosure to me, and that you’re not going to do.

      Who got da rings runnin’ around who now, baby?

      Sounds pretty ‘cr’ to me. But he read all the stuff at CPC, so he does imitations of Nick Land to tease, while trying to find his lost self-admiration without having to pay the price for it. And he’ll pay too.

      I’ve said what I’ve got to say, and I’ll say more till you block me if I feel like it. I know how you control this place, but you got your jollies from exploiting me, so, you see, you were the only one I really trusted, because of the way you treated my work, but you blew it. I’m sorry for that, but maybe this will teach you that you have to be less half-assed when it comes to some things.


      Comment by anonymous — 19 April 2010 @ 8:54 pm

  11. “But you told me you didn’t.”

    That’s not true — it was none of your business as far as I was concerned, just as it’s none of anybody else’s business what you might or might not have told me in private correspondence, anonymous. Of course the name he told me could be false, which is why I say that it’s impossible for me to know for sure. As I say, I harbor no suspicion that that’s the case, though it’s clear that you do. That’s why I asked at the beginning of this discussion on the prior thread, after you mentioned NB’s other purported names: what would it take to persuade you that NB is only NB here, and that he’s not NL? You said there was nothing that could persuade you, so here we are at the same impasse where we began yesterday.


    Comment by john doyle — 19 April 2010 @ 9:02 pm

    • Because that’s not a decent question, of course I’m not going to answer it. ‘NB’ and you have your thing. Yes, as far as you were concerned, it was none of my business. But, you know, on the contrary, it was very MUCH my business. I am not going to discuss that with you, and you two have bonded, as far as I’m concerned. No, we’re not at the same impasse, you did something that gives NB certain rights to say what he wants. In any case, you didn’t ask me about ‘NL’, I was thinking of the other monikers he uses here, and that is easy to pick out. I just won’t repeat them, in fact, you may well not even have remembered them, but he knows them well. He quit using ‘NB’ for awhile. He’s an asshole, but he’s YOUR asshole.


      Comment by anonymous — 19 April 2010 @ 9:21 pm

  12. You have no more questions, and I have nothing more to say about it.


    Comment by john doyle — 19 April 2010 @ 9:34 pm

  13. oh vell, ‘NB’, that illustrious scientististic freak, will have much to offer you from here to eternal minotaur pregnancy.

    No further questions? Yes, your honour.


    Comment by anonymous — 19 April 2010 @ 9:48 pm

  14. “Yes, you did. You said at Dejan’s that ‘there is no love like your love for Land’s’, which was the only decent mistake you ever made.”

    I meant in John’s previous post, you fool. And you brought up NL in that thread on Dejan’s … but who cares?

    “We just had DRAGON FRUIT, you shithead”

    You absloute clown.

    “I DON’T know that NB has told you his real name, that’s what’s changed since this afternoon. He could swear that he has, and you can swear that he has, but you don’t know what I’ve been up to, and if he does know, he’s not going to say. He was hoping that I would say that here, but I’m no fool.”

    You’ve been eating dragon fruit.

    Or have you? It’s so exciting!


    Comment by NB — 20 April 2010 @ 5:05 am

    • Connie Francis to NB:


      Comment by anonymous — 20 April 2010 @ 7:58 am

    • http://thaifood.about.com/od/introtothaicooking/ss/dragonfruit.htm

      This demonstrates the technique of EATING DRAGON FRUIT, as well as choosing it. It claims to be ‘sweet and delicious’, but the flavour is not that rich, and by itself proved to refuse us its subtleties. This demanded an addition of a whole mango and green grapes, which were then mixed with the cubed dragon fruite, and doused with Tahitian Avatea Lime Liqueur, which is not made from lime leaves, though. All of this is packed as per the internet instructions into the beautiful shell of the DRAGON FRUIT, which is often eaten by Justin Fischer and Hailey Meng, nice part-time internet junkies.


      Comment by DRAGON FRUIT — 20 April 2010 @ 8:08 am

  15. Come to me now. Come to Nikki. Don’t make me WAIT.


    Comment by chief parodist — 20 April 2010 @ 5:36 am

  16. Yes, this does seem to be re-enacting an all-too-familiar pattern, doesn’t it, chief?


    Comment by john doyle — 20 April 2010 @ 6:28 am

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